IN THE MOTHERHOOD

I love these webasodes (SPELLING?!) they are so funny... sometimes not very realistic, bvt funny. It is such a gorgous day outside today it seems like a crime to have to work and insane that it SNOWED Saturday morning. I have been hearing so much about Britney Spears lately and I can't help but notice that she fell off the deep end and it never occured to her that she was getting near the edge. I am struck by how easlier this happens. We are blind to our own destructive behavior. Our parents try to allow us as adults to make our own way, they are stuck watching us drowned in a pool of our own design. Anywho, I have decided to start blogging to help myself deal with an addiction. I am a workaholic, last week I worked 86.5 hours. That is in one week and two of those days I commuted 1.5 hrs each way to work. I once thought I did it for the money but I have begun to think that it is truly an addiction. Other things in my life suffer because of this, my house, my relationship, my health, but most heart breaking in my children. With any addiction it is not easy but I feel the first step is admitting there is a problem. So here goes, I have a problem. Today I am making a commitment to myself to no longer deny the problem but to face it head on. I will daily take one hour to do something for myself. I am scheduling this hour between 4 and 5 pm. During this hour I will take the time to be proactive in making myself a healthier, happier human. After picking up the boys I will dedicate the next hour to time for them, we will do something TOGETHER. The boys and I will eat dinner together. I am setting a bedtime for myself. I will go to bed at a normal hour. My part time job is limited to one day per week. As I sit here I am overwhelmed by the thoughts of this. I know to a normal person this seems simple and enjoyable but to me this sounds like asking me to climb Mount Everst.